his mind is a mess, searching for the words to some how EXPLAIN his actions, but that’s easier said than done when morisuke wasn’t entirely sure of the answer himself. he just … needed the c o n t a c t. the COMFORT. and lev was there so close to him and making his heart race in a way the libero would never admit to. the tears have halted for the moment, yet that embarrassment was only replaced with ANOTHER, face red and hot over the fact that he just k i s s e d the latter out of nowhere. morisuke opens his mouth to say something, ANYTHING, but promptly shuts it when nothing comes.
burning cheeks, though, are soon met with rough hands and his eyes snap back to lev as lips are pressed against his own once again. it catches him off guard, takes a moment to process that this is ACTUALLY happening, but morisuke soon finds himself leaning into it. a hand comes to rest atop one of lev’s at his face and the other grips at the material that clung to lev’s chest, mouths slotting together. it’s EASY and CALMING and for the first time, in a long time, the weight of the world seems to be lifting from his shoulders. at least, until the r e a l i t y of the situation sinks in, and it comes crashing down around his ears. he’s about to GRADUATE and leave this all behind. he shouldn’t be kissing a first year.
with hesitance he pulls back, wide eyes locked on their future ace as he once again searches his mind for words he didn’t have. ❛ lev . . . ❜ what could he SAY?‘ sorry i kissed you, but i’ll be gone soon and this can’t be happening ‘ ? his hand at the latter’s shirt comes up to grasp lev’s other hand instead, gently bringing them down from his face and cupping them together. morisuke can’t look at him, eyes lowering as he sucks in his bottom lip to chew on as his ANXIETY builds back up.
❛ … i’ll be graduating soon. everything is CHANGING. we should … keep some things the same, you know ? ❜
albeit he was a little SURPRISED the kiss was returned, not a single complaint was uttered at the returned affection. morisuke stole his first kiss and in a way the ace was GLAD it was him and not anybody else. his thumb lightly strokes against his flushed cheek, any reminiscences of tears being w h i s k e d away. eyes fluttered closed, and he went with the flow of the situation. being with the other like this, it made his heart flutter, bringing forth a jubilant feeling inside of him. but, that feeling would soon be SHATTERED to pieces.
once he doesn’t feel the other’s lips anymore, bright green eyes dart down at him, a MUDDLED expression locked into place. there was hesitation, like he didn’t want to be apart from him. he felt the same. all this talk about graduation and him leaving – it affected lev in more ways than one, but he CONCEALED such troublesome emotions from his teammates. the rookie player was open to change, exciting new things could come from it. but this? was h o r r i b l e. it hurt, so bad. much more pain than any of his devastating KICKS could’ve ever provided. he didn’t WANT to stay the same.
feeling him hold his hands, and hearing him say such things without even LOOKING him in the eye crushed his spirits, (who knew that could happen?) his hands quiver and tremble as their suddenly RIPPED away from the libero’s grasp, and returned to his sides in the form of balled fists. he wanted to keep them there, run away, and not look back. but he didn’t. instead, his shaking form lowers over the shorter one, head nestled in his shoulder, and that’s when the OPTIMISTIC lev haiba crumbled right in front of the one headmiredthe most.
he didn’t put all of his weight on him (fortunately) but, that act of staying positive was long gone.
fingers weakly clench onto the sleeve’s fabric; a weak whisper shaking out of his lips, ❛ i-i don’t want THINGS to stay the same…❜ he chokes out the words as his breath becomes HITCHED in his throat, the pain suffocating him. he wanted yaku there to see him improve, excel, and shine brighter then the sun. he wanted to be with him. why? why was it soUNFAIR.
